It seems like forever ago

December 10, 2009 at 12:03 am (Uncategorized)

Hello my sexies,

As I sit here and ponder my new found life in marriage I find myself thinking back. It wasn’t too long ago that I was single and socializing with everyone and getting to know the inside scoop of everything… I mean, wow! I knew a lot of what was going on.

As I am in my new life struggling to hold on to a little bit of “me”, the “me” that knew me as “Spice”. This has been a long and windy road. I have been “Spice” since the age of 17yrs old. I really don’t know how to act any other way but as “spice” or josh. My new life finds less and less room for “spice” and is more inviting of josh.

You guys are probably thinking that I might be a lunatic that has split personality. No, not really. “Spice” was my alter ego turned front man. Its the part of you that is afraid of letting go, letting loose. Everyone has a little bit of “spice” in them its just the matter of having you find it and then using it.

Love changes all things however… its not the fact that it changes you or you change because you have love… its the choice of letting it affect you in a way that you do change. Simply put… you evolve over time with love being a major influence but you do not change whom you are… just as its difficult to teach an old dog new tricks its just as difficult to suppress “hide” yourself away. Eventually if you suppress yourself for too long… whatever you suppressed will eventual need to come out.

The lesson that I have learned is that you can not let love change you or choose to change because of love but rather live and continue to be who you are and everything will be a lot easier.

Trust me! Many trials and errors and im left with the answer… be who you want to become and not be something you are not for anyone! Including yourself.

I’ve stayed quiet long enough. Now im back full force!

Where are my spicekateers? Hehehe!



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